Advanced merphology for doctors



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Reese's Law

Analyzes marked "urgent" will be delivered in the most roundabout route possible.

Warman's rule

Until a patient is prescribed a certain drug, no one looks at his medical history about the presence of a drug allergy in this patient.

Curse of Marlowe

The dissatisfaction after the loss of a patient lasts much longer than the joy of saving him.

Meltzero's law diagnosis

The fact that the patient is doing well does not prove that your diagnosis was correct.

Shield's Law

Whatever troubles arise, there is always a colleague who knew that it would be so.

The dictum of Hippocrates

Extreme treatments are best suited for extreme illnesses.

Wasted time principle

On Friday after 4:40 pm, no treatment procedure can be performed properly.

Spark's rules for doctors

1. Always strive to look awfully important.

2. Speak with authority and authority; state, however, only the obvious and proven facts.

3. Listen carefully while others argue and discuss the problem. Then pounce on some small blunder or a trivial statement to bury your opponents with it.

4. If a subordinate asks you a substantive question, look at him as if he is crazy. When he gets confused, rephrase his question and re-pass it to him.

5. When leaving the office, move at a fast pace - this keeps questions from subordinates to a minimum.

6. Always keep your office door closed. This puts visitors in the position of petitioners, and at the same time makes everyone think that you are always busy at an important meeting or meeting.

Boren's law for cats

If in doubt, wash yourself.

Eli's Law for Actors and Medics

Wear your uniform and the role will play itself.

The first rule of the doctor

Whatever happens, pretend it was intended that way.

Scott's first law

Whatever bad happens, it will most likely appear normal afterwards.

Galen's rule

The main thing is to do no harm.

Merkin's medical principle

For complex cases, there are simple and easy to understand wrong solutions.

Wright's Law

The doctor has the opportunity to bury his mistakes, but the architect can only advise his clients to put ivy on the facade.

Disraeli's diagnostic dictum

Often the mistake is more significant than the right step.

Tournier's truism

Many of the common illnesses are nothing more than expressions of severe dissatisfaction with life.

Voltaire's observation

The art of healing exists for the purpose of entertaining and amusing the patient while his body is healed of the disease.


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